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Danielle Casciano

Final Portfolio: Danielle Casciano

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Page 1: Final Portfolio: Danielle Casciano

Danielle Casciano

Page 2: Final Portfolio: Danielle Casciano

Table of Contents

Shadow Narrative

Part One

Part One Reflection

Part Two

Part Two Reflection

Final Reflection

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Shadow Narrative

Guilt in a Little Black Box

I fingered the black velvet box in my hand. I opened it, closed it, and opened it again. I

paced around my room. My lavender walls that my dad painted himself surrounded me, closing

in. The vanity and matching dresser my mom spent hours picking out for me when I was

thirteen. My bed neatly made with hospital corners that my mom made during breakfast. On the

vanity, sat a glass picture frame engraved with the word “family”. In the frame was a picture of

my parents and me in Tuscany, Italy. I was standing in the middle with both of my parents on

either side, their arms wrapped around me.

Guilt surged through my veins like lava. My stomach shook and sat in my throat. My

palms held a layer of sweat and no matter how many times I wiped them, the sweat pool. My

body temperature sky rocketed and plummeted. The back of my shirt soaked with sweat. My

heart beat in every inch of my body. I stopped in front of my bedroom door, the black velvet box

gripped tightly in my right hand. I turned the door knob, and my hand slipped from the sweat. I

closed my eyes tilted my head back and took a deep breath. I slowly opened the door and saw

my mom across the hall. She was wearing her favorite pink pajamas with my bleach stain on the

right thigh. Her short brown hair tussled on top of her head. She glanced up and smiled at me

and went back to organizing her purse. This was a weekly routine for her.

I walked slowly down the hall way. I dropped the box on the floor and it split open.

“Shit.” I mumbled to myself. I filled my lungs with air and exhaled. I came to the door of parent’s

room and cracked it open.

“Mom, are you busy?” my voice was shaking.

“No of course not, birthday girl. What’s up?” She looked at me and smiled and continued

to neatly organize her purse.

My parent’s room is gigantic and only has a couple pieces of furniture lined with

organized clutter. On the night stands there are two lamps and sitting underneath both is the

picture of my family from my first trip to Disney world and my father holding me for the first

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time in a pale blue hospital gown. I was all bloody, gross, and did not even look like a human yet

but my father’s eyes glistened like I was the most beautiful thing he has ever seen.

On their dresser were the plaques with the Virgin Mary and Jesus that I bought at the

Vatican the first time I went to Italy by myself. Great, now God is watching me break my mother’s heart

too, I thought. And sitting in between the plaques was the first Mother’s Day card my dad

bought for her before I was born.

“Do you want to go out to dinner tonight? You can pick the place. I heard there’s a nice

Italian place over in Marlboro.” My mother didn’t even look up. The last thing I wanted was eye

contact.

“Yeah, Italian sounds fine.” I could feel the words boiling in the back of my throat. I kept

swallowing but they sat there. Pushing the way to the front of my mouth. “I don’t like the

earrings.” It spewed out of me like vomit.

“What?” My mother’s eyes swelled. I could see the tears bagged behind her lids. “That’s

okay; I can keep them until you’re older.” She took the black velvet box from my hand. Her touch

seared my skin.

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Part One: Content Translation

Like mother like daughter

The apple does not fall far from the tree

A statement, that is true

In many ways

She passed down all of her best (and worst) qualities

Strong wills butt heads like bulls

Golden hearts exactly the same

Confidence shines from both of us

Like mother like daughter

Her gift giving sprit

Her desire to make me happy

On the day that I became an adult

The little black box

With two small diamonds

Glistened

And I hated them.

Like mother like daughter

I knew how she would react

Strong wills tire

Golden hears beak

Confidence diminishes

I hand her back, that little black box

She tilts her head

A tear rolls down her cheek

I cannot be mad, because

Like mother like daughter,

I would feel the same way

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Part One Reflection

In this content translation, I had to choose which parts of my narrative I wanted to

express in my poem and establish rules to do so. Before writing, I reread my shadow narrative

and wrote down key points or lines that stood out for me. I decided to concentrate on my

central character in my narrative, my mother. I tried to characterize her personality and her

habits and how they are very similar to mine. I also decided to keep the concept of the little

black box, because I feel as if that represents the guilt I felt throughout my narrative and in my

poem.

One of the rules I established prior to my translation was the use of repetitive lines to

express emotion, importance, and change. First, I repeated the line “like mother like daughter”

to emphasize the similarity between me and my mother. I made this the title because I felt as if it

was the most powerful line on the poem. I chose this as the title to give the reader an idea of the

characters before reading the poem. I also chose to repeat but change and entire stanza, to show

the emotional change that is also expressed in my narrative. I used this repetition to express that

the narrator of the poem expected the change. Another rule I followed, was not to use casual

language in my poem that I used in my narrative piece. In my narrative piece, I used words such

as “mom” and “mommy” but in my poem I did not do so. I wanted to make the tone more serious

than my narrative.

When first starting this poem, I really struggled to pick out details. I went through my

shadow narrative with a highlighter to highlight important parts. By the end of it, the whole

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thing was highlighted. Needless to say, I scraped it. When I re-looked over my essay, I first tried

not being so highlighter happy, and then I tried to see what in my narrative made the most

significant change throughout. I decided to focus on character and I targeted my main character.

I highlighted the important characterization lines as well as when the character changed in

emotion, personality. A strong aspect of my narrative that I found was the similarities between

me and my mother. Therefore, I decided to express this in my poem.

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Part Two: Rhetorical Translation

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Part Two Reflection

When making this translation, I debated on whether I wanted this to be a text-based or

image-based. I decided to make this an image-based translation to give way to the setting and

timing of my narrative. I first wanted to use a black velvet box, but I realized that there is little

to no text on this and I wanted to incorporate text to support my image. I decided to use a

birthday cake because it incorporated both of the aspects I wanted to represent.

One of the rhetorical decisions I made was coloring. I chose the effect on this picture to

be dim and dark to emphasize the emotion. I also chose the color blue for the same reason.

Another decision I made was the font. I debated using a robotic font to show seriousness and

evoke a specific emotion. But I decided to use a more birthday cake- like font. In this translation,

I wanted to use a longer sentence than just “Happy Birthday!” My reasoning behind this was

evoking stress and anxiousness. The rhetorical decision I made, unlike my poem, was to only

include feelings on this image. I did not use character, but only the feelings the narrator felt in

my narrative piece. I feel as if in this translation, it would be easier and more effective to capture

the emotion of my narrative. Characterization on this image would be too clustered and

ineffective.

Further, when making this translation I decided to use a culturally common item and

language for my translation. Everyone in my target audience understands the concept of a

birthday cake and what is normally written on one. In this translation, I wanted to take a spin

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on that. Another rule I made in this translation was to use a lot of punctuation to make my

sentence choppy. I made this decision because it added to the stressful and anxious emotion. It

also broke it to make it more like a birthday cake saying.

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Final Reflection: Goals one and four

As a writer it is important to have a general knowledge of the writing process. This

includes brainstorming, planning, writing, and revising. However, this is a very elementary

process. Throughout this course, I was exposed to all parts of the process but in an

individualized in recursive way. I was able to create my own writing process and emerge from

this course as less planned and concrete writer, and a more creative and thoughtful writer. The

first step I encountered in this class was figuring out why I even want to write in general. If I

didn’t know this simple fact, why continue writing? I feel as if this is my first step in my

personal writing process. In George Orwell’s “Why I Write”, he outlines the reasons why people

write. First, before reading this piece I told myself “I write because I like too.” But once I saw all

the internal and unspoken reasons behind writing, I tried to categorize myself. I soon realized,

there are way too many parts of my reasoning that overlap Orwell’s ideas. I write to be clever

and different but I also write to have an effect on my audience. And quite simply, I came to the

conclusion that I write because it what I know and what I’m good at. But I also write for myself,

to express my ideas, entice a reader, and vocalize my opinions.

Secondly, I hated revision before this class. To the point where I simply avoided it and

pretend it didn’t exist. But through the revisions of my shadow narrative, I realized revision is

actually a huge part of my writing process and it needs to be. Through this class, I realized that

revision is not just checking for grammar and spelling errors but it’s taking a piece and looking

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at it in a new light. Through the shadow narrative revision, I was able to pick out what I needed

and what I could throw away. I first did this by starting my essay from a turning point. This

required me to dig through my piece and focus on the climax and the change in feeling. Next, I

needed to make a 250 word sentence. Honestly, I got this assignment and wanted to cry. I

thought no way could I make one sentence 250 words. But I sat down, took out the most

important parts of my piece and make them into one connecting idea. In this course, I learned

that revision is the development of important ideas in order to write a piece I was satisfied with

and that a reader would enjoy.

Before this class, I understood the basic conventions for writing in various genres. I

knew how to write poems, narratives, non-fiction, etc. But throughout this course I was

challenged to write in brand new genres and situations that quite frankly, made me

uncomfortable. I realized that there are more than just the spoken genres of writing. A writing

situation I was placed in that was very foreign to me was the concept of a shadow narrative. I

was not supposed to write about something that happened to me that I was comfortable telling

everyone. I was told to write about something I’ve been hiding. And this as a whole put me in a

new writing situation and made me translate genres that I never had before.

Simply, this entire portfolio I was forced to write in various translations that were brand

new to me. This form of translation was discuss in Judith Ortiz Cofer’s “But Tell It Slant: From

Poetry to Prose and Back Again” where she does exactly what the title says. This essay helped

me realize that in order to make my first translation for this portfolio, I must find the key

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elements in my piece. And also for my second translation, I had to do the same thing. But for

both of these, I needed to focus on different aspects in order to make both translations effective.

Another goal I achieved in this class was the ability to demonstrate the ability to use

various devices in writing. For example, in my shadow narrative I used scene and character

through dialogue in short descriptions. I modeled this after, “An Evening in April” where the

author expressed their conventions on scene and character through short descriptions . She uses

an excerpt about welfare to show the economic situation. Through the craft talk in this class, I

also learned helpful devices to make my writing more concise and interesting.

Overall in this class I emerged as a writer who is more conscious of their writing process

and their writing skills. Through this class I learned how I work as a writer and how I write the

best. And simply, I learned why I write. I also learned in this class the importance of revision.

Many classes I have taken have emphasized this importance but never followed through on it. I

developed a piece that I had to revise many times and it showed me firsthand how revision can

develop and shape a work.